I love lying to computers. One finds out the most interesting things that way. For instance, this questionnaire, "
Is Your Man Gay?
" (much better graphics there), wasn't intended for my gender (as if my 'man' was gay, it would be freakin' obvious, no?).
So, here's the answers to the questions (I made up answers to get answers, but they are close to honest):
How often do you have sex with your man?
You Answered:
Once a week
What Everyone Else Said:
| 6% More than once a day | |
| 8% At least once a day | |
| 27% A few times a week | |
| 15% Once a week | |
| 21% A few times a month | |
| 12% Every few months | |
|
11% Once a year |
Since there's no one else here, that's kind of an obvious made-up answer.
Which of the following would your man most enjoy?
You Answered:
A Broadway show
What Everyone Else Said:
| 18% A Broadway show | |
| 20% A hockey game | |
| 6% A poetry reading | |
| 35% A rock concert | |
| 21% A monster truck show |
Generically, 'rock concerts' have been less than useful to attend, since the bands haven't been altogether that amazing as a group (though I'd still go to a special one). Poetry reading often is just watching someone do something sophomoric in public so that they can get it out of their system, and it's not often I ever watch any sports at all (though I'm interested in live productions, as the crowd often intrigues me a great deal).
Has your man ever dressed up in women's clothes?
You Answered:
I'm laughing so hard I can't even answer that
What Everyone Else Said:
| 16% I'm laughing so hard I can't even answer that | |
| 4% I've caught him in my closet several times | |
| 5% My man has a fetish for dressing up in women's clothes | |
| 22% Only for costume parties | |
| 53% My man wouldn't be caught dead in women's clothes, regardless of the occasion |
That one is pretty funny since I videoed a lot of 'The Dolls' productions in Albuquerque. Just the idea of me (w/beard) in a dress is hysterical.
If you pointed out a nice-looking guy to your man, he would...
You Answered:
Say he doesn't judge what men look like
What Everyone Else Said:
| 36% Nonchalantly agree with you | |
| 4% Express sheer adulation for the hottie | |
| 29% Ignore you | |
| 25% Say he doesn't judge what men look like | |
| 6% Stare far too long at said hunk |
I've often wondered what it is about men that women (and gay men) find 'attractive' in men, but I can't actually fathom it most of the time. It's pretty intriguing to listen to them discuss it, though.
When you're in public, how often does your man strike up conversations with men you don't know?
You Answered:
If there's a reason, he'll converse with men we don't know
What Everyone Else Said:
| 14% He's always making new male friends | |
| 15% My man never speaks to men he doesn't know | |
| 7% He has a tendency to be overly-friendly to the same sex | |
| 58% If there's a reason, he'll converse with men we don't know | |
| 6% If a man we didn't know struck up a conversation with my man, he'd likely walk the other way |
Geez, I'm always talking to all sorts of people at random in public. I'm not particular in starting them, but I do tend to prefer the conversations with beautiful attractive available females.
How many gay friends does your man have?
You Answered:
A couple
What Everyone Else Said:
| 48% None, he's not that open-minded | |
| 41% A couple | |
| 5% Most of his friends are gay | |
| 5% We hang out with a lot of gay men, but they're mainly my friends |
I got involved with a lot of gay men and women in Albuquerque (initially through the Green Party, and ultimately through the cannabis de-prohibition movement). They are all wonderful people (for the most part--there was one really weird bad apple), and I'm glad I live in a time that they can explore their beings and express it. It's very interesting.
Which of the following your man most likely to listen to?
You Answered:
The Bee Gees
What Everyone Else Said:
| 8% ABBA | |
| 3% Barbara Streisand | |
| 5% The Smiths | |
| 2% Erasure | |
| 20% Jay Z | |
| 9% Neil Diamond | |
| 24% Linkin Park | |
| 14% Godsmack | |
| 6% Celine Dion | |
| 9% The Bee Gees |
BTW, it would be PRE Saturday Night Fever Bee Gees, most likely, and it's not like I don't have most of the above in iTunes.
Most of your man's wardrobe consists of...
You Answered:
Purple button-down shirts
What Everyone Else Said:
| 3% Purple button-down shirts | |
| 2% Pink polo shirts | |
| 17% Black Corona shirts | |
| 51% Whatever I buy for him | |
| 27% Designer shirts of all colors |
Actually, it's mostly turtlenecks, but they aren't on here (and there's a lot of colors). I don't like ties particularly. They aren't 'designer' at all. I'd prefer them in hemp if I could get them.
Which movie would your man most enjoy?
You Answered:
Die Harder
What Everyone Else Said:
| 51% Die Harder | |
| 6% The Birdcage | |
| 7% My Best Friend's Wedding | |
| 7% Brokeback Mountain | |
| 3% Evita | |
| 26% Platoon |
Gee, that's a dismal assortment of movies to pick from. I think it's a 'least bothersome' movie that is being picked here. I'd more likely watch something like Star Wars or Harry Potter than any of these.
Has your man ever kissed another man?
You Answered:
Absolutely not
What Everyone Else Said:
| 28% If he has, I don't know about it | |
| 6% Only when he was really drunk | |
| 4% One time in college | |
| 31% Absolutely not | |
| 10% I have my suspicions | |
| 21% No, but he's kissed a whole lot of women |
I think Carlos Pollo might have pecked my cheek, greeting me at a party, perhaps, but nothing romantic.
How does your man feel about porn?
You Answered:
Every now and then, he's up for some good porn
What Everyone Else Said:
| 10% I'm married to an aficionado | |
| 10% He has it for breakfast, lunch and dinner | |
| 53% Every now and then, he's up for some good porn | |
| 8% He has one porn video that a friend gave to him | |
| 12% My man is disgusted by porn | |
| 7% He likes porn featuring two men |
My favorite porn is the animated Japanese stuff. I think that's more that I like oddities than that it's actually that alluring, but one can say that 'No Humans Were Harmed' during the drawing of the movie, too.
Which hobby would your man most likely participate in?
You Answered:
Ballroom dancing
What Everyone Else Said:
| 27% Bowling | |
| 16% Cooking classes | |
| 2% Cross-stitching | |
| 32% Paintball | |
| 17% Softball | |
| 6% Ballroom dancing |
I might actually do more knitting (close to xstitch, which I've thought about programming code for), and I already cook things past 'cooking class' quite a bit. I really could use more activity, and my ankles are getting better enough that I can really almost move again (almost), and I've always wanted to Tango. I used to be able to Foxtrot, Samba, and (of course) Waltz. And there's always Polish Slam-Dancing (Polka).
Your man is really in touch with his feminine side
We're not saying your man is gay; we're just saying he might be gay. Maybe he's the consummate metrosexual or maybe the signs point to the fact that there is something he's not telling you -- like the fact that he likes men. At the heart of the matter, it appears your man enjoys some stereotypically "gay" things -- ABBA, pink shirts. The Birdcage, cross-stitching and Broadway. And did we mention your sex life sucks? While there is absolutely nothing wrong with being gay, you probably want to explore the fact that you and your man really aren't a match made in heaven. If you've had your suspicions, it's time to bring them up. While it's a great thing to have something in common with your significant other, your love of the same sex probably shouldn't be that "thing."
How you scored against others
| 63.16% ' Your man is straight as an arrow ' | |
| 33.33% ' Your man is really in touch with his feminine side ' | |
|
3.51% '
You love your man, but he loves men
' |
Yeah, I'm definitely in touch with being a human. It's my species, yano?
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