December 2009 Archives

Long Dry Spell over?

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I am in Dallas (well, Plano).  My trip to ABQ was very invigorating, if a bit odd (Ai made a big deal out of wanting to see me, but when I arrived, she wouldn't even take my calls).

Dallas is even odder.  I'm here in a hotel with my brother (thank god we have separate rooms).  He's still an idiot, and he's still annoying as hell.  I woke up this morning at quarter till six, and he was dressed and ready to strike up a conversation with me as soon as I'd stepped outside to smoke a cigarette.

I think we might be working it out, however.  I made it plain to him that if I *EVER* wanted to have a conversation with him again, I would start it.

I don't plan on starting any conversations with him.

On Reflection ...

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It appears that the machinations of the U.S.S.R. are quite a bit closer to 'miraculous' than the work of G-d and his minions.

After all, they don't have to 'wax' Vlad like Bernadette and he seems to be keeping quite well.

Again, the story is just fascinating.

Boy, this is bad ...

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The first Ethiopian release of the Secure OS first penned by Linus Torvalds?

Just so you know . She actually has a wax mask and wax hands. The article makes it sound as if there was no decomposition of her body. There is very little compared to anyone else. Check the link and it will tell the story.

I don't like how some people twist things around for the internet these days. It makes it really hard for me to belive anything I see on the internet.

In 1925, the church exhumed the body for a third time. They took relics, which were sent to Rome. A precise imprint of the face was molded so that the firm of Pierre Imans in Paris could make a wax mask based on the imprints and on some genuine photos. This was common practice for relics in France, as it was feared that the blackish tinge to the face and the sunken eyes and nose would make an unpleasant impression on the public. Imprints of the hands were also taken for the presentation of the body and the making of wax casts. The remains were then placed in a gold and crystal reliquary in the Chapel of Saint Bernadette at the mother house in Nevers. The site is visited by many pilgrims and the body of Saint Bernadette is still shown despite being nearly 130 years old.[2]


(from tiny 'tim')


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My folks sent me a picture of St. Bernadette, and I noted the miracle of preservation implied (122 years):


Now, compare that to the state of Mr. Lenin:

Lenin in tomb in Moscow
2004 photo

You might like the full story on how much time/effort it takes to keep Vladimir fresh.

No tales of how God does the first one.

Frank S.ent a Gem for Xmas

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 With the likelihood of Christmas being tight for everyone this year,


I thought I would pass this on.

(See the house on the right.)


More Weird Stuff

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So, I think what's going on in my shin is actually going on all over, but it just looks different depending on how deep it was to start with.

This morning, I had kind of a darker red spot on my chin, and it itched, and I scratched it, and I scratched out a bit of white flesh about as bit as a barleycorn (just popped out).

The weirdest thing is that there's no 'hole' where it was.  I can't quite figure that one out.

I've got another on my cheek that looks like it's trying to do the same thing.

Geography Lessons:

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The Geography of a Woman: 

  • Between the ages of 18 - 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas. 
  • Between the ages of 21 - 30 a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with countries with cash or cars. 
  • Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India or Spain. Very hot, relaxed and convinced of its own beauty. 
  • Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France or Argentina. She may have been half destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit. 
  • Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Yugoslavia or Afghanistan. She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary. 
  • Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia or Canada. Very wide, quiet and the borders are practically un-patrolled but the frigid climate keeps people away. 
  • Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England or Mongolia. With a glorious and all conquering past but alas no future. 
  • After 70, they become Albania . Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there. 

The Geography of a Man: 

  • Between the ages of 15 - 70 a man is like the USA ... ruled by nuts.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography. 

Ambrose Bierce

From "Neptune's Daughter"

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From my Brother

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Rash is moving

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The awful cracking, dripping, oozing stuff has moved mostly off of my face.  What's left is only a few places where it's still inclined towards losing slices, and a bunch of places where just one little white lump comes up when scratch a bit (looks somewhat like I've got salt stuck on my chin).

The thing that looked like a gash in my leg is quite clearly some kind of capsule of stuff being ejected (albeit quite slowly).  Enough had stuck out and been cleaned off that it dropped down in size from a thimble last week to about a pea this am, and it broke into three littler parts today.

I'm not sure what it was, but it's dead now, and it was at least thirty years old.

The Worst Christmas Album, Ever

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I thought I had it, but then I got it.  It used to be "A Celtic Christmas" (which wasn't terribly Celtic so much as it was 'elevator music').

But then, I got a free Xmas CD this week from Blockbuster.  It says right on it it's not for resale, which is really good for the distribution model.

It's called NLO, and it's the 'Northern Light Orchestra' doing covers of the names of familiar carols (along with some oddities).  Nothing on there remotely resembles anything, and it's all done pretty heavily metal.

You can find out more about them at their myspace account:

Or, I suppose you could go to Blockbuster and get your own free copy.  I don't think they'll run out anytime soon.

Jesus vs. Santa

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Southpark Jesus vs. Santa

This one is pretty sick: WWE Jesus vs. Santa.  It's pretty cheesy when Santa grabs the J-man by the halo and knees his face.

The original Southpark: 'Jesus vs. Frosty'

So, I'm starting to get that great spew of Xian stuff as the confirmation of the sun's rebirth celebration approaches.  I've gotten movies, picture shows, etc. all continuing the re-programming of culture to believe the simple lie that the founders of this country were on some kind of 'Mission from God' (er, Jesus, yano?).

It's a lie. The people who propagate it knowingly are liars, the rest are dupes.

The founders were honest intellectuals who were in the age of 'The Enlightenment', if you recall.

They were (if you read below) mostly *DEISTS* (the only really proper intellectual stance of a 'believer', IMHO).

And really, the idea of a cross and and eagle on the same banner is just freakin' creepy (looks Naziesque).  I wonder what the Jewish soldiers think of this?

The image of Jesus standing with this group of men, after one has read the article below, isn't creepy, it's Daliesque.

You can ignore history, but you can't really re-write it, only mis-represent it.  It's clear.  The United States of America has been a specifically non-Christian nation since 1797.

The Founding Fathers Were Not Christians

by Steven Morris, in Free Inquiry, Fall, 1995

"The Christian right is trying to rewrite the history of the United States as part of its campaign to force its religion on others. They try to depict the founding fathers as pious Christians who wanted the United States to be a Christian nation, with laws that favored Christians and Christianity.

This is patently untrue. The early presidents and patriots were generally Deists or Unitarians, believing in some form of impersonal Providence but rejecting the divinity of Jesus and the absurdities of the Old and New testaments.

Thomas Paine was a pamphleteer whose manifestos encouraged the faltering spirits of the country and aided materially in winning the war of Independence: 
I do not believe in the creed professed by the Jewish church, by the Roman church, by the Greek church, by the Turkish church, by the Protestant church, nor by any church that I know of...Each of those churches accuse the other of unbelief; and for my own part, I disbelieve them all." 
The Age of Reason by Thomas Paine, pp. 8,9 (Republished 1984, Prometheus Books, Buffalo, NY)

George Washington, the first president of the United States, never declared himself a Christian according to contemporary reports or in any of his voluminous correspondence. Washington Championed the cause of freedom from religious intolerance and compulsion. When John Murray (a universalist who denied the existence of hell) was invited to become an army chaplain, the other chaplains petitioned Washington for his dismissal. Instead, Washington gave him the appointment. On his deathbed, Washinton uttered no words of a religious nature and did not call for a clergyman to be in attendance. 
George Washington and Religion by Paul F. Boller Jr., pp. 16, 87, 88, 108, 113, 121, 127 (1963, Southern Methodist University Press, Dallas, TX)

John Adams, the country's second president, was drawn to the study of law but faced pressure from his father to become a clergyman. He wrote that he found among the lawyers 'noble and gallant achievments" but among the clergy, the "pretended sanctity of some absolute dunces". Late in life he wrote: "Twenty times in the course of my late reading, have I been upon the point of breaking out, "This would be the best of all possible worlds, if there were no religion in it!"

It was during Adam's administration that the Senate ratified the Treaty of Peace and Friendship, which states in Article XI that "the government of the United States of America is not in any sense founded on the Christian Religion." 
The Character of John Adams by Peter Shaw, pp. 17 (1976, North Carolina Press, Chapel Hill, NC) Quoting a letter by JA to Charles Cushing Oct 19, 1756, and John Adams, A Biography in his Own Words, edited by James Peabody, p. 403 (1973, Newsweek, New York NY) Quoting letter by JA to Jefferson April 19, 1817, and in reference to the treaty, Thomas Jefferson, Passionate Pilgrim by Alf Mapp Jr., pp. 311 (1991, Madison Books, Lanham, MD) quoting letter by TJ to Dr. Benjamin Waterhouse, June, 1814.

Thomas Jefferson, third president and author of the Declaration of Independence, said:"I trust that there is not a young man now living in the United States who will not die a Unitarian." He referred to the Revelation of St. John as "the ravings of a maniac" and wrote: 
The Christian priesthood, finding the doctrines of Christ levelled to every understanding and too plain to need explanation, saw, in the mysticisms of Plato, materials with which they might build up an artificial system which might, from its indistinctness, admit everlasting controversy, give employment for their order, and introduce it to profit, power, and pre-eminence. The doctrines which flowed from the lips of Jesus himself are within the comprehension of a child; but thousands of volumes have not yet explained the Platonisms engrafted on them: and for this obvious reason that nonsense can never be explained.
Thomas Jefferson, an Intimate History by Fawn M. Brodie, p. 453 (1974, W.W) Norton and Co. Inc. New York, NY) Quoting a letter by TJ to Alexander Smyth Jan 17, 1825, and Thomas Jefferson, Passionate Pilgrim by Alf Mapp Jr., pp. 246 (1991, Madison Books, Lanham, MD) quoting letter by TJ to John Adams, July 5, 1814.

James Madison, fourth president and father of the Constitution, was not religious in any conventional sense. "Religious bondage shackles and debilitates the mind and unfits it for every noble enterprise." 
"During almost fifteen centuries has the legal establishment of Christianity been on trial. What have been its fruits? More or less in all places, pride and indolence in the Clergy, ignorance and servility in the laity, in both, superstition, bigotry and persecution."
The Madisons by Virginia Moore, P. 43 (1979, McGraw-Hill Co. New York, NY) quoting a letter by JM to William Bradford April 1, 1774, and James Madison, A Biography in his Own Words, edited by Joseph Gardner, p. 93, (1974, Newsweek, New York, NY) Quoting Memorial and Remonstrance against Religious Assessments by JM, June 1785.

Ethan Allen, whose capture of Fort Ticonderoga while commanding the Green Mountain Boys helped inspire Congress and the country to pursue the War of Independence, said, "That Jesus Christ was not God is evidence from his own words." In the same book, Allen noted that he was generally "denominated a Deist, the reality of which I never disputed, being conscious that I am no Christian." When Allen married Fanny Buchanan, he stopped his own wedding ceremony when the judge asked him if he promised "to live with Fanny Buchanan agreeable to the laws of God." Allen refused to answer until the judge agreed that the God referred to was the God of Nature, and the laws those "written in the great book of nature." 
Religion of the American Enlightenment by G. Adolph Koch, p. 40 (1968, Thomas Crowell Co., New York, NY.) quoting preface and p. 352 of Reason, the Only Oracle of Man and A Sense of Historycompiled by American Heritage Press Inc., p. 103 (1985, American Heritage Press, Inc., New York, NY.)

Benjamin Franklin, delegate to the Continental Congress and the Constitutional Convention, said: 
As to Jesus of Nazareth, my Opinion of whom you particularly desire, I think the System of Morals and his Religion...has received various corrupting Changes, and I have, with most of the present dissenters in England, some doubts as to his Divinity; tho' it is a question I do not dogmatize upon, having never studied it, and think it needless to busy myself with it now, when I expect soon an opportunity of knowing the Truth with less trouble." He died a month later, and historians consider him, like so many great Americans of his time, to be a Deist, not a Christian. 
Benjamin Franklin, A Biography in his Own Words, edited by Thomas Fleming, p. 404, (1972, Newsweek, New York, NY) quoting letter by BF to Exra Stiles March 9, 1970.

The words "In God We Trust" were not consistently on all U.S. currency until 1956, during the McCarthy Hysteria.

The Treaty of Tripoli, passed by the U.S. Senate in 1797, read in part:"The government of the United States is not in any sense founded on the Christian religion." The treaty was written during the Washington administration, and sent to the Senate during the Adams administration. It was read aloud to the Senate, and each Senator received a printed copy. This was the 339th time that a recorded vote was required by the Senate, but only the third time a vote was unanimous (the next time was to honor George Washington). There is no record of any debate or dissension on the treaty. It was reprinted in full in three newspapers - two in Philadelphia, one in New York City. There is no record of public outcry or complaint in subsequent editions of the papers.


My Congressman Called Me

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No kidding.  Last night, about seven pm, I got a cold-call from a 'Telephone Town Hall Meeting' which went on for an hour.  

I never got my question on.  I was going to ask him what he thought about my being denied health insurance due to my use of medical marijuana.

Midnight Mess

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Ok, here's my *favorite* rock-n-roll Xmas song of all time. It's the most curious mix of 'Gloria In Excelsis Deo' and Van Morrison's 'Gloria'. It's third on the playlist:


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A favorite holiday recipe for you to enjoy!!! Happy Holidays!! 


Jose Cuervo Christmas Cookies 
1 cup of water 
1 tsp baking soda 
1 cup of sugar 
1 tsp salt 
1 cup or brown sugar 
4 large eggs 
1 cup nuts 
2 cups of dried fruit 
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila 

Sample the Cuervo to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. 

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. 

Add one peastoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still ok, try another cup just in case. 

Turn off the mixerer thingy. 

Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. 

Pick the frigging fruit off the floor. 

Mix on the turner. 

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaters just pry it loose with a drewscriver. 

Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity. 

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who geeves a sheet. Check the Jose Cuervo. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. 

Add one table. 

Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. 

Greash the oven. 

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. 

Don't forget to beat off the turner. 

Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the wishdasher. Cherry Mistmas ! 

If you weren't there when it was released, you probably would have to do historical research to see how revolutionary it was.

I kid you not, somebody (er, Glock?) claimed that this lead guitar was carved whole from an Irish feast table?

Was that the one?

In any event, the sound's still phenomenal.

Gender reversal between wolf and ingenue.

Xmas Redux

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Yeah, they are worth repeating:

For the faithful:

I don't want to be alone this Christmas.
I don't want to have it on my own.
What's the point of opening the presents,
when no one's there to watch me?

I don't want to be alone this Christmas.
I don't want to celebrate this year.
The last time I tried to set the table up for brunch,
there was no one there to share the fun.

I'll be all alone this Christmastime,
and there'll be nothing else on my mind.
I'm sitting here, alone this year.
While everybody's celebrating, I'll be right here. 
I'll be wasting.

I don't want to be alone this Christmas.
I don't want to wake up in the cold.
I will light the fire in the morning, as 
I watch the snowflakes falling.

I don't want to be alone this Christmas.
I just want someone there to hold.
I will put the decorations in the window.
I'll be O.K. on my own.

I'll be all alone this Christmastime,
and there'll be nothing else on my mind.
I'm sitting here, alone this year.
While everybody's celebrating, I'll be right here. 
I'll be wasting.

I heard the knock at the door.
There was loneliness no more.
I'm glad you're here, now 
I can celebrate this year!

'Cause I won't be alone this Christmastime,
and there'll be nothing else on my mind.
I'm sitting here, with you this year.
While everybody's celebrating, We'll be right here. 
We'll be wasting.

We'll be waiting.
We'll be waiting.
We'll be waiting.

For the silly:

For the Ebeneezer's amongst us:

For the lovers out there.

Cheap Rewards

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The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Elvis Costello
Colbert Report Full EpisodesPolitical HumorU.S. Speedskating

Oh, well, I feel so loose tonight I might fall to pieces
So be prepared to sweep me out the door
And I might be horizontal by the time the music ceases
So I think I'll get acquainted with the floor

Oh, I was trying to get away from the things that I always do
Hello, floorboards once again--how are you?

Lip Service--well, that's all you'll ever get from me
Well, how could you believe I'll take you seriously?
With your cheap rewards, your blackmail, and your comical rage
Just remember you'll only be the boss so long as you pay my wage

All the sign posts on this road that point one way
Don't act like you're above me, just look at your shoes
I'll turn the light out now 'cause there's nothing more to say
And it's all been lost before so there's nothing to lose

Oh, but you could say that you love me very painlessly
I would've done the same for you, oh, but you said to me:

Lip service--well, that's all you'll ever get from me
Well, how could you believe I'd take you seriously?
With your cheap rewards, your blackmail, and your comical rage
Just remember you'll only be the boss so long as you pay my wage

Just remember you'll only be the boss so long as you pay my wage.

If there's a difference between

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The 'Lullaby' version of The Ramones 'Pinhead' and Laurie Anderson's works I'm not seeing it.

Seems that it should be included.

Dec 8, 1980

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Twenty-nine years ago, and yet nearly yesterday, that John was ripped from us.

Bless him, and all his works.
I concur.  Got it twice in one week (funny both times).


"Good news is that I truly out did myself this year with my Christmas decorations. The bad news is that I had to take him down after 2 days. I had more people come screaming up to my house than ever.

Great stories. 

But two things made me take it down. 

First, the cops advised me that it would cause traffic accidents, as they almost wrecked, when they drove by. 

Second, a 55 year old lady grabbed the 75 pound ladder almost killed herself putting it against my house and didn't realize it was fake until she climbed to the top (she was not happy). 

By the way, she was one of many people who attempted to do that. My yard couldn't take it either. I have more than a few tire tracks where people literally drove up my yard." 

Sun Bumps

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Sun bumps is what they called them.  I'd get them on my arms and legs sometimes.

I was trying to figure out what to call this 'bubbling' in my skin, but now that it's subsiding, it's apparent that it's 'fountains of sun bumps' or something like that.

I need to explain

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For my buds at, I want to make clear a point about a neat Grease Monkey script (a few, actually).

For instance (this instance) there's 'Ikariam Empire Overview', which gives (on a good day) a dropdown from the mayor's box that shows the cities:

But that only shows in the S1 (Alpha) world.  In S8 (Theta) the one I was banned in and came back to, I get nada when I put the mouse over the mayor:

And there's always the mis-communication aspect (Language is, after all, a blunt object).  There's also the 'Show Town' drop-down to obfuscate matters:

dropdown on show town.png
BTW, if you (gentle readers) noticed my icons were perhaps a bit less mild than the standard ones, it's because I use the 'Ikariam Sexy Theme' script (same author).


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Lullabye Baby

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Lullaby versions of:

and of course, The Beatles.

I personally got a copy of Bob Marley.  I already had Pink Floyd.

BTW, there's a 'Lullaby' version of The Ramones' "Beat on the Brat" on their sleepytime version.

I'm sure that's a *hit*.



About this Archive

This page is an archive of entries from December 2009 listed from newest to oldest.

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