Male Rape

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I was discussing rape earlier this month, and the issue of it being a 'female' issue was paramount to discussion.

I realized that by now there may be male resource pages.

I'd neglected to consider the other reason that it took so long.  Men have a double-whammy in that they experience the standard female emotions, but have that additional 'male' thing in that they 'should have been able to' stop it (that it happened means the man is 'weak').

Again, I have to point out that the physical trauma of the event doesn't approach the emotional trauma, and that is based almost entirely on a script of assumed 'should haves' that are (AFAIK) wholly unsubstantiated.

I'd not actually considered the 'guilt' of someone who was raped and experienced sexual gratification (I bet that's confusing).  

Still, these are STOCK things.  People need to be told in advance (in detail) about these eventualities.  If it happens, you are GOING to feel certain things, and think certain thoughts (and they are all wrong).

So here's a couple of links:

I've Been Raped

Straight boys, teens, and men never consider the possibility of being raped. It "doesn't happen".

But it does.

Almost always it is nothing to do with sex.

I'll repeat that. Almost always it is nothing to do with sex.

It has to do with power, not sex. Power. The rapist using the power of his body to impose his will on the person who is raped. Penetrating the victim's body with his penis is the ultimate power trip for the rapist. So is your distress, and the pain he is causing you.

If it were to do with sex, why would straight men rape gay boys when they beat them up? And yes, it's almost always a straight man carrying out the rape. And he's not ever going to be gay. A power trip. Ok, there are always exceptions. And if you were raped by a gay man, I know you were one of those exceptions. I said "almost always". There are gay rapists too.

From the UK:

Male Rape and Sexual Assault Within our society, men and boys can suffer appalling sexual assaults and humiliations, but rarely does a victim cry out for help. Such is his feeling of shame, he will often be as desperate to keep it a secret as his attacker is. Confusion, depression and a sense of inescapable isolation are common reactions. They can wreck a man's life. The effects of sexual abuse on men are in many ways similar to those on women, but the response of society is markedly different. Men are seen as strong protectors, capable of defending themselves and those that they care about. When rape occurs feelings of shame, guilt, bewilderment and disbelief often lead to a change of self-esteem. Frequently men feel unable to express their anger and rage at what has happened to them and turn it in on themselves. In a twist that doesn't occur in female rape, sometimes the perpetuator of male rape will arouse his victim sexually, leading him to ejaculation. This is a control move which leaves the victim totally confused as to his role in the rape - did he in fact contribute, by becoming aroused?

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This page contains a single entry by writch published on December 30, 2008 3:22 PM.

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